This year’s scariest holiday floats aren’t made of papier-mâché. They’re built from Hawaiʻi’s headlines and they’re coming down Main Street to haunt your pocket book.

Sing, O Muse, of the ‘Herculean’ effort that could not tame the Cretan Bull of Planning and Permitting, a maddened beast of code and chaos that now stampedes over a cliff, crushing all hope in its path.